ALL THE INDICATORS SUGGEST…….
Mar 4th, 2007 by admin
All the indicators suggest that human nature and the achievement of earthly bliss (or anything even remotely resembling same) are incompatible – or do I mean mutually exclusive? – because of a mathematical anomaly. Spell it out? Certainly: there are infinitely more saints in the world than sinners, and yet…… and yet any time a space traveller approaches Earth and asks his pilot, “Who’s winning down there?” the answer is always the same: “The bastards!”
So far nobody has been able to work out why this is so, [actually I have been able to come up with an explanation, but it is so depressing that I have decided to keep it to myself for now], and nobody has been able to change things though many very big names have tried. Nevertheless this disgraceful imbalance must be fought tooth and nail and for ever, but not all the time. It is a reason for concern, and one should be concerned, but if one became obsessed one would go mad.
Besides, we who dote on sport of various types have access to a little oasis in an otherwise harsh environment; an oasis where the odds are not so blatantly loaded in favour of those with neither morals nor scruples. There we can find much to enjoy, and there we can build up the strength we will certainly need to continue fighting the good fight.
As the thoroughbred horse is a thing of great beauty, and a thoroughly virtuous beast (most of the time), racing will be our staple diet.
And if the world outside sport becomes so unpalatable that one cannot help noticing, we will give those responsible the benefit of our advice. And on the odd occasions when Sport’s bad eggs (even racing has a few, often lurking in the most unexpected places)…. when Sport’s bad eggs poison the atmosphere, they will be called to account.
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BACK TO WORK
Donec took a sabbatical (several monthsworth) because my team is aware that most of our items over the years have been complaints about the extraordinary inability of British Racing’s High Command (BHA) to do its job properly. Aware as we are that this is the year when the BHA has undertaken to lead the industry…
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TIME OUT
It is the 7th August 2023 and I am now intending to publish every two months unless the pattern of life suggests otherwise (which it may). Let me sum up the state of the game at today’s date. THE WHIP JIM MAHON, who died in 2001, aged 84, invented the horse-friendly air-cushioned whip. He was…
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Sport 6/05/2023
Coronation Day I thought I would make a list of all the things that worry me about racing’s health. We have a new king, let’s have a new look at everything. The first cause for concern may be a complete mistake on my part. Not long ago there was a meeting at the very top…
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APRIL 1st 2023
STARTING What did the winning jockey report to the press after the Cheltenham Gold Cup? “I thought the start was a bit of a joke, to be honest, for a gold cup, and we were on the back foot then. Horses were jumping left and right and jumping into me, so all credit to him…
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1st JANUARY 2023
Onwards & Upwards for British Racing Before we forget, let us remind ourselves of the unfortunate baggage which we take with us into the future. 1. The whip debate Fact one: the twenty years it took for dedicated horsemen and racing authorities of the highest quality to come up with the padded whip was not…
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SPORT 135(December 4th 2022)
26th November, Newbury, the Coral Cup, £142,375 to the winner, 15 runners, and all hell broke out at the start, which was False-Started about three times (more than twice anyway) Here are a few thoughts: (Postscript) The Becher Chase at Aintree on December 3rd was exactly the same: a disaster area that has been making…
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SPORT 134 (November 1 2022)
I am delighted to hear that a very strong rescue team is applying its shoulder to the wheel in an effort to save British Racing from the knackers yard. Can I make just one suggestion? Much is said about getting more fans through turnstiles. Racing fans do not grow on trees for reasons which I…
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SPORT 133 (1 SEPTEMBER 2022)
Prize-money: This section is based on an excellent Jonathan Harding article in the Racing Post. in which he compares prize-money funding models around the globe. I quote: ”Prize-money is the lifeblood of racing, but there are growing fears the returns on offer in Britain are not nearly enough to maintain its position as a world-leading…
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SPORT 132 (1ST AUGUST 2022)
WHIP In my July contribution I explained that British Racing has nothing to fear from the anti-whip faction because the BHA knows perfectly well that the padded whip now in use worldwide is pain-free. A proper job was done before the padded whip was given the go-ahead by the British racing authorities in 2006. If…
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SPORT 131 (JULY 1 2022)
The Bigger Picture My reaction to Joe Saumarez Smith’s appointment as Interim Chairman of the BHA was fairly lukewarm. The fact that he was a long-time BHA insider counted against him in my opinion. Subsequently I have done my research, and find him very impressive. He must have a brain the size of a bus,…
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SPORT 130 (1ST JUNE 2022)
Owing to the state of my Information Technology I cannot provide my usual critique of the facts of life in Britain’s Racing Industry. This is a good thing: I have spent far too long being disgusted by the performance of the BHA. My only consolation in this regard is the increase which I think I…
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SPORT 129 (13 MAY 2022)
SPORT 129 This is a mid-month update, because events are beginning to run away from me and weaknesses in my IT technology has let me down bigtime. More likely I have let it down, but the result is the same: a sense of “don’t panic” threatens my comfort zone. Chairperson Mrs Annamarie Phelps leaves the…
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SPORT 128 (APRIL FOOLS DAY 2022)
CHELTENHAM Tuesday: 3 False Starts Wednesday: 3 False Starts The starters’ team adopted emergency tactics for the three big-field-races on Thursday. The first stage was to send the Rolling Maul (the close packed and as yet unstressed runners) back down the track away from the start until it was almost out of sight, and then…
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SPORT 127 (MARCH 1 2022)
has bitten the dust AS A RESULT OF your editor’s incompetence with regard to usernames and passwords. Just now Windows Live Mail isn’t very pleased with me; nor is g-mail. Two vital matters were dealt with by post, and I now have three weeks to put my house in order. I wish you a happy…
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SPORT 126 (2ND FEB. 2022)
PARTIES The two battles of El Alamein (in 1942) were preceded by several months of high tension as Rommel waited for more petrol from Italy and Montgomery for better tanks from America. During this period it became normal for Monty’s junior officers to be sent into Cairo at regular intervals, under orders to indulge…
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SPORT 125 (1ST JAN 2022)
In terms of British Racing, it is impossible to say Happy New Year because there are so many imponderables and uncertainties, plus an overload recently of the sewage which the human race coughs up from time to time. The festive season was not designed for Robbie Dunne and Graham Gibbon. The Bryony Frost case began…
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SPORT 124 (3RD Dec 2021)
INTERFERENCE A month ago, at a hearing conducted by the BHA’s Independent Judiciary, Mr John Berry (racehorse trainer) gave a masterclass on the Interference Rules and their application (See SPORT 123). John warned of the horror story that was surely on it way, when he mentioned the almost unbelievable fact that no Dangerous Riding judgement…
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SPORT 123 (NOV 3 2021)
SPORT 123 (3RDND NOVEMBER 2021) I cannot resist the temptation to make use – in a good cause – of a wonderful bit of writing by the Racing Post’s Chris Cook. It is a vital bit of evidence about the critical situation in which the BHA’s Interference rules find themselves. As follows: John Berry (trainer…
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SPORT 121 (1ST OCT 2021)
I quote from September’s SPORT 120: The House of Commons for example used to treat the difficult relationship between Racing and Betting as a rather charming facet of the British Character. Recently it has changed its tune: it seems to have noticed that gambling as a national pastime is a positive threat to the health…
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SPORT 120 (September 1st 2021)
Lingfield, UB40 Concert after racing, a fight. There is a view that if the racecourses will make themselves more interesting they will attract bigger crowds and allow the management to make more money. Time and again, however, we have seen that more people does not mean more racing fans. It means the same number of…
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SPORT 119 (2 AUGUST 2021)
Stewarding Paul Struthers, the Chief Executive of the Professional Jockeys Association (PJA), recently wrote the following in the Racing Post, in the debate concerning the cooperation (or lack of same) between the Racecourse Stewards and the Independent Judiciary. I paraphrase: “As regards penalties incurred by jockeys for rule-breaking on the racecourse, there are approximately 800…
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SPORT 118 (1ST JULY 2021)
A War Zone Early in the month of June I took part in a healthy exchange of views with a high-ranking member of the BHA’s top table. We agreed that I could express my views on any number of subjects, but if I criticised named officers of the BHA I should expect legal action, visits…
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SPORT 116 (MAY 2 2021)
SPORT 116 (1ST MAY 2021.) Not so long ago Mr Rust (BHA Chief Exec) and Mrs Phelps (BHA Chairperson) announced that the Kingsclere Apprentice Academy was violating human rights, because the management was taking too much of the income generated by its apprentices on the racecourse. They said that the rights of young people in…
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SPORT 115 (02 APRIL 2021)
MUSHROOMS Once upon a time, one of the ultimate pleasures was watching horses work up on the gallops and returning to breakfast with a hatful of large flat mushrooms which added something so, so, so special to the fried breakfast. Have I mentioned that nowadays large flat mushrooms are available at Tesco’s? No kidding, they…
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SPORT 114 (2ND MARCH 2021
SPORT 114 (March 2nd 2021) STARTING Today, March 2nd, is the 17th Anniversary of the letter I received from the Senior Steward of the Jockey Club in response to a critical letter of mine on the subject of starting Big Fields under NH Rules. He assured me that the matter was under review and all…
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SPORT 113 (FEB 1 2021)
SPORT 113 PRINCE KHALID Prince Khalid Abdullah was a prince in more senses than one. So was the man who introduced him to the top level of British racing, the late Jeremy Tree. That’s a mistake. Mr Tree was never a prince, not even in one sense. What am I trying to say? I…
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SPORT 112 (1 JAN 2021)
KING GEORGE VI CHASE, KEMPTON PARK, BOXING DAY The ground (good to soft, officially) played a major part in the way things turned out. Bryony Frost and Frodon set a pace that was comfortable for them and perhaps just a bit demanding for most of the others on that ground, and the winning team’s jumping…
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SPORT 111 (DEC 1 2020)
FENCES On the subject of riding over fences, here are two quotations from the best book ever written about horseracing, “Men and Horses I have known,” by George Lambton. Reminiscing about the l88Os, he wrote: “Old John Hubert Moore, Garrett’s father, was a wonderful old fellow, a great, rugged, tall man (about 6 foot 4…
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SPORT 110 (1 November 2020)
REFLECTION This virus is hell, but it gives one time to reflect. I reflect on the subject of the BHA. For the last sixty years this organisation has been claiming sick benefit, acting dead, or possibly just cheating the racing community by playing games which are designed exclusively for the benefit of the BHA itself.…
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SPORT 109 (1 oct 2020)
RACING AND THE VIRUS In my opinion, Racing has responded to the virus in a manner that is exciting and remarkable and a delight for anyone who holds the sport in high regard. As far as I can see, everybody has put shoulder to wheel and applied best endeavour to job in hand. As regards…
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SPORT 108
MORE THAN A TRIPLE CROWN In the spring of 2014 California Chrome won the first two legs in America’s Triple Crown, and finished 4th in the Belmont (the third leg). This alerted “Donec” to the world of Triple Crowns, apart from England’s own combination of 2000 Guineas, Derby and St Leger, so we applied ourselves…
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SPORT 107 (1ST AUGUST 2020)
NO SILVER BULLET I take this opportunity to flog a dead horse, because it refuses to give up the ghost. It seems to be impossible to stop otherwise intelligent people from insisting that British racing’s survival and prosperity depends on the sport somehow or other converting into passionate enthusiasts several million people who have for…
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SPORT 106 (1 JULY 2020)
HOT STUFF Richard Forristal’s brilliant account of the Irish 2000 Guineas (Racing Post, Friday, 12th June) should be read in full and cherished indefinitely. I quote Mr Forristal: “Social distancing rules in Ireland provide for gatherings of no more than six people and Aidan O’Brien had sought to make full use of that quota with…
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SPORT 105 (1st JUNE 2020)
RESUMPTION (OF RACING) If the BHA has prepared a resumption plan that will work, it has done well. If it has decided to factor in the greatest good for the greatest number of those afflicted by the virus (i.e. the bigger picture), it has done even better. The industry has everything to play for. Fingers…
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SPORT 104: 1ST MAY 2020
Here is something that I note with more than passing interest: Racing Post 26th April 2020. Henrietta Knight: Questions and answers. “If you could change one rule in racing what would it be?” David Gable asks. Answer: “Improve the starts. I hate standing starts, especially in the big races. You can’t have 25 super-fit horses all…
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SPORT 103 (31ST MARCH)
SPORT 103 A GLANCE AT THE Stewards Report for the Betfair Hurdle, Newbury 8th February and one finds the by-now-normal verdict: “Having reviewed recordings of the false start the starters were satisfied that no riders should be reported….” It really is embarrassing to read such rubbish emanating from the top brass of a great sport…
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CORONAVIRUS 1
CORONAVIRUS 1 In 1914 racing was stopped by the government because of WW1, and then resumed on a limited scale in response to public opinion. It turned out that the men at the front found that news from the racecourses of England provided vital relief from the horrors of killing and being killed in mud…
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SPORT 102 (1ST MARCH 2020)
Apprentice pay changes I understand that the new arrangements come into force at the beginning of the 2020 Flat season. Just about now, I imagine. The BHA was asked to deal with a small number of trainers who do not reimburse the legitimate expenses incurred by, and paid by, their apprentices. This project was well…
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SPORT 101 (1 FEB 2020)
CEO, CIAO Nick Rust has announced that he will step down from his position as CEO of the BHA at the end of 2020. He got good reviews from all the pundits, and he gets a good review from Donec, even though we have disagreed on several occasions, and are still at loggerheads in some…
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SPORT 100: JAN 1 2020
BORIS I am delighted with Boris’s performance. At last a Prime Minister with brain and guts, and someone who isn’t in politics for the money. Such a pleasant change from the appalling Mrs May, the disgraceful Cameron, the unspeakable Blair. The suggestion that Boris tells lies is interesting. Take the matter of the nurses. He…
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APPRENTICES (22 DEC 2019)
APPRENTICES Andrew Balding’s Kingsclere yard is a highly successful racing stable, and also an educational establishment for apprentice jockeys which has spent 60 years getting better and better (first under Ian Balding and now under his son.) A crisis has arisen recently because a number of trainers who employ apprentices have been unwilling to pay…
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SPORT 99 (1 DEC 2019)
XMAS LITERATURE There are certain books that transport the reader into a different world, but they are few and far between. Very few and far between, hence rare and precious. I can only think of three. As Xmas is just round the corner I take this opportunity to share a bit of happiness with my…
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SPORT 98
No horse that does what Diego du Charmil did to Capeland can keep the race involved. Never. The fact that steward Simon Cowley takes a different view is irrelevant (except as an indication of the standard of stewarding available on our racecourses) . Similarly no horse that suffers what Capeland did can be blamed or…
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SPORT 97 (1 NOV 2019)
L’Arc de Triomphe The three horses who led into the final straight all fell away as the lactic acid paralysed their straining muscles. This left Enable in front and she put clear water between herself and the rest, only to “hit the wall” about fifty yards from the post, where she was mugged by the…
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SPORT 96 (2ND OCTOBER 2019)
RULES OF RACING: Procedures and Penalties. 4. THE WHIP. Notes on Penalties; Rule (F) 45 (I have done my best to make what follows interesting…even exciting… and hopefully correct. A.S.) When deciding whether or not to hold an enquiry re. the whip, Stewards should consider how the rider has used the whip during the course…
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SPORT 95 (SEPTEMBER 1 2019)
CATCH-UP TIME You will doubtless remember the angry letter to the Racing Post, signed by ex-trainer Knight (Best Mate), ex-trainer Egerton & current trainer Channon. It castigated the BHA in general terms and shredded CEO Nick Rust in particular. The authors are not known firebrands – so what had upset them? A TV interview between…
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SPORT 94 (1 AUGUST 2019)
WHIP The brothers Jim and Frank Mahon, the Stewards of the Jockey Club, Lord Oaksey, John Hislop, Nick Skelton, Wally Swinburn, Sir Peter O’Sullevan – all good people – combined to design and promote the most animal-friendly pain-free whip ever developed. It took twenty years, and it worked –it still works. This has been, I…
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SPORT 93 (JULY 1 2019)
Thought Number 1: If the Ascot Authority could be persuaded to take over from the BHA, British racing’s problems would be solved – just like that. Wishful thinking? Certainly. As things stand (Thought Number 2), apart from the BHA the Horsemen’s Group (HG) is the only unit which bears the responsibility for ensuring that the…
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SPORT 92 (1ST JUNE 2019)
Ruby Walsh I was reprimanded for not saying nice things about Ruby Walsh’s retirement in the May issue. Let me fill that gaping and possibly disgraceful vacuum twice over. 1. In the RP’s excellent “Tribute to Ruby”, his father Ted refers to Ruby’s habit of blaming himself when beaten in a close finish. “You…
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SPORT 91 (2 MAY 2019)
If I were to write a letter to Mrs Phelps, who becomes Chairperson of the BHA on June 1st, it would go something like this: Dear Mrs Phelps, Prepare for war. War about Animal Welfare, war about Whip and Interference rules, war about Stewarding. Also prepare to be brave; I suspect that any realistic report…
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SPORT 90 (APRIL 5 2019)
Here’s something even more irritating than Theresa May. You point out to the BHA that big-field jump races (approx. 15 runners or more) are started in a most peculiar manner (quite different to the methods used for most British jump races), and it causes False Starts, Unfair starts, Dangerous starts. Eliminate the most peculiar manner,…
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SPORT 89 (MARCH 1 2019)
More horsemen on the BHA Board? Interesting, but fraught with a considerable difficulty. Something to do with consensual decision-making. It means that if a board member does not agree with the majority, he or she has to accept defeat without complaining. I believe that is the way the BHA runs itself. I have a feeling…
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SPORT 88 (FEB 1 2019)
More Whip Furore? I hope not. The padded whip is the finest contribution to Animal Welfare ever created, and was produced by British Racing. It is now a worldwide winner. With that superb achievement in the bag, all that is required is for the BHA to roll up its sleeves and celebrate this monumental triumph…
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POST 87 (3RD JAN 2019)
I am looking at a BHA publication entitled “2017-19 Business Plan (Update for 2019)”. Pages 1 and 2 tell me that Racing is under threat and in peril and can only be saved if the industry stumps up vast sums of money for the BHA to spend on the fight for survival, which will involve…
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SPORT 86 (4TH DEC 2018)
Reading a Bill Barber article in the Racing Post (6 September 2018) I came across the following: “Concerns over the Harman issue have led some of the BHA’s shareholders to question the remit of the BHA itself.” “Remit?” I consulted Google. “Remit. The task or area of activity officially assigned to an individual or organisation.”…
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SPORT 85 (3RD OCTOBER 2018)
BREXIT When the referendum happened, sane people had every reason to think that life as we knew it was a thing of the past, but few would have imagined that the new model would be the handiwork of the treacherous Michael Gove and the beneficiary-in-chief the devious and politically worthless Mrs May. Gove is like…
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SPORT 84 (1ST SEPTEMBER 2018)
SPORT 84 STEWARDING Recently the BHA unveiled its new stewarding model (due to be introduced later this year). It is based on what is described as a “one team” philosophy. In practical terms the present arrangement for racecourse stewarding involves five people – three BHA employees and two Amateur stewards. The new model will also…
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SPORT 83 (1ST AUGUST 2018)
March 10, 2018, Sandown Park: the Imperial Cup Handicap Hurdle Race. An extreme example of dangerous riding. The aggressor horse, on its way to winning the race by a neck, bumped the victim horse three times as it shepherded it towards the rails. The Interference Rules state that any interference that involves one rider pressuring…
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SPORT 82 (2nd JULY 2018)
MORNING GLORY Several weeks ago there was a reference in the excellent RP to “morning glories”, a term which describes horses that eat up the ground at an amazing pace on the gallops – breathtaking in more senses than one. However when the beasts arrive at the races and the money is down, they…
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SPORT 81 (1 JUNE 2018)
GIRL POWER Hayley Moore arrested the galloping “Give Em a Clump” at Chepstow in a manner that reminds one how very “equal” racing’s females really are. I cannot remember seeing a man doing anything half as brave, and I personally would have wandered slowly in the opposite direction, with a preoccupied look on my face…
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SPORT 80 (May 1st 2018)
How well I remember…. Last Saturday at Sandown…. the 3.35, the Bet365 Gold Cup (3miles, five furlongs, over many fences so cunningly positioned that untalented jumpers would be well advised to follow their profession elsewhere; the race with which Colonel Whitbread’s brewery gave birth to the practice of race sponsorship by vast businesses with a…
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SPORT 79 (2 APRIL 2018)
THE IMPERIAL CUP March 10th, Sandown Park, the Imperial Cup Handicap Hurdle Race was the most extreme example of dangerous riding I have seen for some time, and the Stewards declined to punish the culprit (Mr Antolini, ridden by J. Bargary) or to compensate the victim (Call Me Lord, ridden by D. Jacob). Later that…
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THE REVIEW
RACING POST, 17th December 2017 Andrew Simpson, a regular contributor to the Racing Post’s letters page, who worked for Jeremy Tree and Toby Balding in days of yore, is no stranger to the world of racing-based novels. “Between the Stirrup and the Ground” is his third such offering – albeit the first for more than…
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SPORT 78 (1ST MARCH 2018)
FEMALE JOCKEYS Much talk in recent months about the ladies: lack of opportunities…. should be encouraged…. should be given weight allowances….. men are so unkind, etc. I claim a miniscule right to hold and express an opinion, on the grounds that, as far back as 1995/6, I wrote an article on this very subject in…
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SPORT 77 (1ST FEB 2018)
ITV ITV Racing has much to be proud of, (Ed, Oli, Rishi, Hayley, Luke, Jason…. that’s enough pride) but in the entertainment business (especially the sporting entertainment business) you cannot afford to offend too many people too often. The other day Ed Chamberlin (head of the team) was putting the program to bed when a…
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SPORT 76 (JAN 1 2018)
PROHIBITED SUBSTANCES “The rules are clear that it’s the trainer’s responsibility to prevent horses taking part in our sport with prohibited substances in their system.” That used to be the principle before the Quinlan Reforms were implemented. It meant that, if no other culprit was available, the system would automatically blame and penalise the trainer. The…
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SPORT 75 (4TH DEC 2017)
GRUMBLES Raul da Silva helps a problem horse enter the stalls peacefully and gets penalised. That’s what happens when the people calling the shots know nothing about horse management and very little about racing. That is also the reason why inexperienced jockeys are punished for “not trying” when in fact they have simply mistimed their…
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SPORT 74 (NOV 1 2017)
Self-certification. Might it not be a good idea to run the BHA computer across the figures already collected, in a scan that will pinpoint the instances when a withdrawal (or several) will affect the betting market in favour of the layer and against the interests of the punter? Shrinking the each-way terms, for example. In…
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SPORT 73 (OCTOBER 1 2017)
CROWD CONTROL We at Donec have reservations about the notion that every sort of person should be encouraged to go racing, including people who aren’t particularly interested in the sport, and people whose participation is not unconnected with the term “yob culture.” Racing is a subject made up of a multitude of facets, all of…
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SPORT 72 (1 SEPT 2017)
The 28 days are up; a new chapter is added to the Donec archive, and no trace of vandalism or graffito is to be seen. All my own work, unless the hand of the Almighty has been involved. If that were to turn out to be the case it would perhaps be time for those…
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SPORT 71 (2 AUGUST 2017)
THE WHIP “There is currently a legitimate role for the whip in racing” the BHA announced recently, and it added that the nature of the modern cushioned whip ensures that it does not compromise horse welfare. This is a vast step in the right direction. The whip is not just used to encourage horses to…
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SPORT 70 (JULY 1 2017)
DISCIPLINARY Donec welcomes the announcement by the BHA that the changes to the disciplinary system will ensure the future integrity of that system. Donec is not so happy with Mr Rust’s assertion that “it is essential that the sport’s participants and followers continue to have confidence in our judicial system.” “Continue to have confidence….”? In…
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SPORT 69: 1 JUNE 2017
On Friday 5th May 2017, 26 jockeys involved in the FALSE START at the beginning of April’s Grand National were handed one-day bans by a British Horseracing Authority disciplinary panel. “The 26 jockeys were charged because they did not take a turn when requested by the starter, which is in contravention to rules agreed… three…
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SPORT 68 (3RD MAY 2017)
STARTING April 8th. Grand National. The Start. Total Cock-up. Who was to blame? The BHA. Has the BHA been charged? Good heavens no! 31 jockeys are “on report.” Then silence. The phoney war. When hostilities resume, 31 jockeys and their leader, Paul Struthers, should make mincemeat of a hotch-potch of cringing BHA executives who would…
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SPORT 67: 2 APRIL 2017
OVALTINE? We understand that the developed world has stopped sleeping properly and is consequently malfunctioning. Serious concern has been expressed and much time and money is being devoted to the search for a remedy. Donec has never shirked its duty to come to the aid of the bewildered masses. The thoughts of the boardroom are…
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SPORT 66 (MARCH 1 2017)
Six Nations So far, only Scotland beating Ireland has impressed: witty, intelligent, running rugby, plus heroic defence against a considerably heavier pack. In the second round Scotland never managed to deal with the French pack, and lost every scrum (just about). They also sinned too often, which meant more scrums, more agony. Interesting point: unless…
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SPORT 65 (FEB 2 2017)
KEMPTON Somewhere in the Kempton Park press release (January 10th 2017) issued by Jockey Club Racecourses (JCR) I find, “The King George VI Chase can be moved to Sandown.” Recently there have been other references from JCR to “other races” and to “selected races” being similarly transferred. These were timely warnings that I was reading…
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SPORT 64 (JAN 4, 2017)
SPORT 64 AMERICA American politics could make one shudder – but it’s not compulsory. Donec relies on the fact that President-Elect Trump builds golf courses and (one imagines) plays the game himself. Wrapped in that fragile comfort blanket, we are prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt for the moment. He could surprise…
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SPORT 63 (4TH DECEMBER 2016)
RUGBY UNION It is our contention that if, as ten-year-olds, Jonathan Davies, Jerry Guscott, Gareth Edwards, Gerald Davies and Barry John had been taken to an international match played 2016 style, none of them would have been tempted to take up the game. Why? Because nowadays most of the playing time is devoted to mud-wrestling…
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SPORT 62 (6th November 2016)
ANNUAL REVIEW Reflecting on British horseracing in 2016, we find that the horses are of a high standard, as are the stable personnel, the trainers, the jockeys, the owners and the breeders. British racing can also be proud of the finest racecourses anywhere in the world, and such is the variety of those racecourses that…
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SPORT 61 (END OF SEPTEMBER 2016)
THE TOTE I understand that Betfred’s licence, whereby the bookmaking megalith has control of the Tote, comes to an end in the not too distant future and that a new licence will be “up for grabs.” This situation gives me an opportunity to express my great joy at the resignation of Prime Minister Cameron, quite…
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SPORT 60 (End of August 2016)
WISDOM 1 “It is a truth universally acknowledged,” that a military man, in possession of a good fortune and with aspirations in the world of horseracing, must be in want of an excellent trainer. One arrangement that has stood the test of time requires the military man to finance the operation, and entitles him to influence…
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SPORT 59 (END OF JULY 2016)
STARTING In Sport 58 I drew attention to the fact that on the flat (as at the Royal Ascot meeting for example) fields of up to 28 runners enjoy perfect calm during the period that precedes the start, whereas under NH rules large fields are to be seen at the same stage becoming more and…
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POLITICS 12: SEWER-RAT
Referendum. Madhouse. Cameron opted for a Referendum, which was really stupid, because in a referendum huge numbers of people decide the issue, and huge numbers can’t possibly understand something as complicated as Britain’s EU involvement. Still, Cameron’s decision came as no surprise because he has shown himself to be mentally challenged practically every time he…
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SPORT 58 (END OF JUNE 2016)
IT WAS towards the end of April 2016 when the BHA announced a number of new initiatives launched by CEO Nick Rust, which included an urgent review of the way disciplinary and appeal panels are constituted and managed. Mr Rust is to be congratulated for grasping a nettle which his predecessors in recent years have…
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REFERENDUM: NON-REVERSIBLE? WHAT RUBBISH!
If REMAIN wins, Britain can say goodbye any time it feels like. If LEAVE wins, Britain just needs the time to sack its worst enemy (Mr Cameron). Then all avenues are open, including further chat with our euro-friends (but not masters). Best wishes, Donec
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SPORT 57 (END OF MAY 2016)
WHIP Recently Donec produced a comprehensive account of the Whip Rule Dilemma, which continues to be problematical. It required more than 800 words. The Donec board decided this might send the reader to sleep, so a Japanese poet was commissioned to abridge it. As you know, Japan is the home of the haiku, a poem…
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P0LITICS 11: BREXIT 3 (WARS & RUMOURS)
The Luxembourger (Jean-Claude Juncker, Head of the EU) announces that the EU needs an army. He says that NATO doesn’t cater for all the EU countries. In fact there are 28 countries in the EU and 28 in NATO. Five EU members are not in NATO (Cyprus, Finland, Ireland, Malta and Sweden). Five NATO members…
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Politics 10: BREXIT EXPLICIT AS NEVER BEFORE
There is just a chance that the last few weeks have revealed Cameron in his true colours: very stupid (which we knew already) and extremely unpleasant (which we suspected). So stupid is he, and so unpleasant, that there is now a good chance that LEAVE (or BREXIT) will win the referendum. This puts a…
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Politics 9: CAMERON AND EUROPE
It occurs to Donec that a vast number of people are likely to vote LEAVE simply because they cannot stand Cameron. We cannot fault their judgement as regards the man, but we wonder if leaving the EU is a price worth paying simply for the pleasure of his absence. Any suggestions? We suggest that the…
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SPORT 56 (2nd MAY 2016)
EUREKA! I think I may have had one of those moments – a bright light has suddenly flooded an area of darkness. I saw writing on the wall…. Consider the following: “It is the duty of a jockey, all else being equal, to obtain the best possible placing for the horse he is riding (that…
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WASTE MANAGEMENT (9TH APRIL 2016)
On Monday 11th April I emailed all my Donec contacts (including the BHA) with a celebratory description of the start of the Aintree Grand National on Saturday 9th April. I contrasted it with the start of the 1.45 on the same card which I had seen, and which I described as having “gone down the…
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SPORT: GRAND NATIONALS 2016 (Aintree and Ayr)
GRAND NATIONAL, AINTREE 9th April 2016 39 runners, close beneath the stands, supposedly in a melting pot, a crucible, and yet somehow quite unaffected (both horses and jockeys) by the excitement of the moment. They had cantered down, inspected the first fence, and returned to the assembly point, where they were walking around in…
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SPORT 55 (END OF MARCH 2016)
INTEGRITY Adam Brickell’s report into the BHA’s integrity and disciplinary departments is a wonderful development. For years and years there has appeared to be a vacuum at the top of the BHA which allowed those running the integrity field to do very much as they liked for long periods, which is not a good idea.…
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SPORT 54 (2ND MARCH 2016)
HAD TO GET A RUN INTO…. Our racing correspondent writes: There seems to be some correlation between the number of horses injured on the racecourse in recent months and the number of times one hears the mantra “I had to get a run into such-and-such.” In fact, connections never have to get a run into…
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SPORT 53 (FEBRUARY 2ND 2016)
ABPs Donec’s policy is to entrust its financial observations to someone who knows all about right and wrong but nothing about money. Why? Because accountants are not always to be trusted. Here is what our moral philosopher has to say about ABPs. Racing is facing a money crisis. All concerned (the racing industry, the betting…
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SPORT 52 (NEW YEAR’S DAY 2016)
Without the PSYCHOLOGY, which turned out to be a trifle too turgid, and can be kept for another day. TINGLE CREEK CHASE, SANDOWN FIFTH DECEMBER, 2015. Sire de Grugy jumps across Special Tiara at the last causing maximum interference and practically turning the victim sideways (See You Tube Tingle Creek Chase 2015, 3 minutes, 30…
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Politics 8: How dangerous is David Cameron?
I can’t help thinking that our Mr Cameron is the most dangerous man in the world, particularly if one is British. I remember with alarming clarity the passion with which he advocated bombing Assad a few years ago, and the infantile petulance with which he reacted to Parliament’s refusal to allow him to do so.…
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SPORT 51 (END OF NOVEMBER 2015)
SPORT 51 LADY JOCKEYS Donec’s oldest operative reminisces: “How well I remember foxhunting in my youth, with three packs in particular, Old Berks, Tedworth, Royal Artillery, and there was another called the North something-or-other. Later on, drag-hunting with the glorious Bucks & Berks. Believe it or not, if you asked the oldest subscriber to any…
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SPORT 50 (END OF OCTOBER 2015)
RACING 1 Here’s something that worries Donec a little bit: Sir Mark Prescott regularly volunteers his prescription for making the whip rules work. He has long been held in awe by a bevy of racing journalists for the size of his brain and may possibly have taken to believing every word they write. Recently another…
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SPORT 49 (END OF SEPTEMBER 2015)
SIMPLE VERSE AND BONDI BEACH St Leger disqualification Donec’s only written comment in the run-up to the appeal was to express relief at not having to adjudicate. It was a difficult one, and the final judgement (that Simple Verse should be reinstated as the winner) was probably correct. Race-fixing not for the BHA However, in…
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POST 48 (END OF AUGUST 2015)
RICHARD HUGHES RETIRES Once again R. Hughes is ahead of the game. Only now have I had time to collect my thoughts on this extraordinary man. I first became more than simply aware of him towards the end of 2011, when the BHA produced new Whip Rules. I quote the excellent James Pugh and…
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SPORT 47 (END OF JULY 2015)
Re. the CORAL CHARGE (Sandown 4th July), the Racing Post reported that: WIND FIRE ridden by Oisin Murphy “barged through 100 yards out” (finished 2nd to Waady). SPLIT QUARTZ was “badly bumped 100 yards out” (finished 3rd). STEPPER POINT was “badly bumped 100 yards out” (finished 4th) Murphy admitted that he had gone for a non-existent gap,…
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SPORT 46 (END OF JUNE 2015)
MARIA SHARAPOVA bites the poussiere, well done Serena. In a way I am pleased that my crusade is unnecessary: when I watched the semi final, her screams sounded infinitely less offensive than they had in her previous match. It is possible that my attempt to destroy her career was the result of faulty volume control…
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SPORT 45: END of MAY 2015
WHIPPING EXCITES BARONET Sir Mark Prescott is a man for whom I have recently developed a profound admiration. He is very knowledgeable. I have no doubt that he knows all about the late Jim Mahon. He surely knows that the BHA, in one of its better moves, encouraged, authorised and made available to racing throughout…
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SPORT 44 (A HISTORIC EDITION)
THE ELECTION I first noticed Cameron when he stole Winston’s gift to Racing – the Tote – and sold it to Fred Done. After that I kept a jaundiced eye on him and couldn’t help noticing that he made endless mistakes and was (and still is) entirely charmless. That was when I started begging influential…
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SPORT 43 (END OF MARCH 2015)
STARTING At Cheltenham the starting was so much better than in previous years. However the present system has an Achilles Heel, which will betray it sooner or later. Flat racing in Dubai – at the start an atmosphere of calm and quiet. Flat racing in England – the same thing. All relaxed, with the excellent…
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SPORT 42: END OF FEB 2015
PORRIDGE A report from our gourmet: I spoke about porridge in the last outpouring but at that time I was unaware of an extra special delight which can be gleaned from Scotland’s national treasure. As follows: if one devours the warm contents of the pre-heated bowl while pacing calmly round the dining room table carrying…
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SPORT 41 (END OF JAN 2015)
BITTAR Donec regrets Paul Bittar’s resignation and is astonished. Since the 1990s, when Lord Hartington (now the Duke of Devonshire) and Christopher Haines took racing by the scruff of the neck and dragged it into the modern world, Bittar has been the one and only quality act to appear on the scene. He extinguished the…
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SPORT 40 (NEW YEAR’S DAY 2015)
Happy New Year! First the very best news CALIFORNIA CHROME In Sport 38 we praised him for finishing third (beaten a head and a neck) in the Breeders Cup Classic, and rejoiced to hear that he stays in training in 2015. We also wondered if he might be seen in Europe. We then forgot him…
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SPORT 39: End of November 2014
MARATHON (Update) I suggested in Sport 38 that you should Google “running form comparison” and notice how Mo Farah takes longer strides than Gebrsellassie and Bikele – longer and therefore using up more energy. Now here’s something equally important. Look at the same filmclip and hold a biro up against the level of the runners’…
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SPORT 38.5 (DIRTY WORK AFOOT)
Ex-jockey Graham Bradley served a five year ban (for talking to the wrong people and saying the wrong things for gain) and has since made it clear that he wishes to train. Since the end of his ban (2009), it is my understanding that he has behaved impeccably. However it would appear that High Holborn’s…
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SPORT 38 (END OF OCTOBER 2014)
STARTING UNDER NH RULES Donec returns to this subject reluctantly and with apologies. Needs must, because the signs are ominous. Recently the BHA’s Mr Stier issued a press release to the effect that he, the jockeys‘ association and the Cheltenham and Aintree authorities had conferred on the subject of large-field starting, and had agreed measures…
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SPORT 37.5 (STARTING UPDATE)
STARTING UPDATE (12th October 2014, 12.43 p.m.) The two-week bedding-in period for the amendments to the starting process under NH rules (with particular reference to large fields) begins tomorrow at Sedgefield. The BHA announced this in a press release issued on Thursday 9th October. It’s on the BHA website under Press Releases. It is interesting,…
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SPORT 37 (END OF SEPTEMBER 2014)
GBB Toby Balding, who died recently, trained winners at the highest level. His record is superb. What stopped him from doing even better was his belief that there was more to life than training. And he wasn’t just referring to tennis and his various other recreational interests, important though he considered them. Quite early on…
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SPORT 36 (End of Aug. 2014)
RACING The prospect of Paul Bittar’s departure from the BHA is a source of great sadness. Before he was even in the hot seat, in 2011, he had taken stock of the Whip controversy and sorted it out. One lived in hope (expectation, even) that he would do the same to all racing’s ailments. Three…
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SPORT 35: End of July 2014
STARTING (big fields under NH rules) The sporting world is abuzz with the rumour that the perfect big-field start has not only been seen in Britain, but has actually been filmed. Following instructions imparted in the utmost secrecy, I dialled up Google and typed in: “2013 Grand National Youtube.” See it for yourself, reader, and…
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SPORT 34 END OF JUNE 2014
C4 Racing – Waving or Drowning? We are looking for reasons why 20 percent less viewers (than last year) watched C4 Racing’s Ascot Gold Cup coverage. Possibly it’s because the programme’s lead presenters are just a little bit dull. Step forward Messrs Luck, McGrath, Cunningham and Fitzgerald. I believe the IMG plan was to make…
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SPORT 33: End of May 2014
STARTING The Grand National Fall-Out has yet to hit the ground. A Disciplinary Hearing is due on 11th June. It would be nice to find it applying itself to improving a starting system which is flawed and, where large fields are involved, responsible for an unacceptable number of unfair starts and false starts. That seems…
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SPORT 32 (End of April 2014)
STARTING I am pleased that chaos (at the start of the Cheltenham Gold Cup and the Grand National) has not triggered the kind of knee-jerk reaction that can only make matters worse. If one can take the “Whitbread” weekend as the end of the jump season (even though the new season bounces into action with…
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SPORT 31 (End of March 2014)
THE BUDGET. I understand that the recent budget contained provision for a measure requiring offshore bookmakers to contribute towards racing’s finances in the same way as bookmakers based in Britain. It also contained, I am led to believe, a measure which would allow the racing industry to charge bookmakers for the right to bet on…
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MUPDATE 16: February Round-Up
Football A My interest in the round ball game is more than half-hearted, but less than full-on: mainly I confine myself to the Premiership and the pan-European club scene. The way the game is played nowadays is fascinating: the players achieve an amazing standard and there are times when one finds it difficult to believe…
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Mupdate 15: January Round-Up
John Porter of Kingsclere (1838 -1922) Wikipedia suggests that the great trainer’s father wanted his son to become a lawyer, but his son opted for the turf. When it was arranged that he should be apprenticed to John Day of Michel Grove, the fifteen-year-old John Porter drew up his own indentures. Anyone who has seen…
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MUPDATE 14: December Round-Up
Racing 1 The Starting Jungle is fascinating. On Hennessy day at Newbury the 1.50 was a 17-runner hurdle race. The field came on to the course from the “holding area” in a long thin procession which set out across the track from the midfield, heading towards the stands – walking. When the leaders…
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MUPDATE 13 (OCTOBER ROUND-UP)
JUDICIAL REVIEW (PART 2) In my HARD WORDS article (Sport) I suggested that it would not be too late to seek a Judicial Review of the Government’s decision to pocket £90 million (half the sale price of the Tote) which by rights belongs to the racing industry. I now discover that applications for Judicial Reviews…
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HARD WORDS
Ten years ago the BHB (British Horseracing Board, as it was called in those days) went to court to establish that the data generated by the racing industry was the copyright property of the racing industry, which that industry was entitled to sell to parties who wished to make use of it. Litigation between the…
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MUPDATE 12 (AUG/SEPT ROUND-UP)
The prophet Jeremiah never stopped castigating his fellow men for various shortcomings; to such an extent that quite soon (we’re talking about 600 BC) the average citizen took to the hills at first glimpse of the old soldier’s bristly chin. My plan is to practice sweetness and light in this Mupdate. The “hard words” can…
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A LETTER TO MR STIER
Dear Mr Stier, During your discussion with Nick Luck on Channel 4 television in July (or was it early August?), you explained your belief that the Rules of Racing concerning “Interference” should be interpreted in such a way as to enable the “best” horse in a race to win it. This philosophy swims against a…
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Mupdate 11 (July Round-Up)
The Lions The ways of providence never cease to amaze me. A second judicial officer decides that Australian captain James Horwill did nothing wrong when he tap-danced on the upturned face of a Lion in the second Test. Therefore Horwill was eligible for the third Test. This travesty of justice was in one way a…
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FALMOUTH FALL-OUT
Falmouth Stakes, Newmarket. 12th July 2013. (Group 1, £102,078 to winner, £38,700 to the second) PART 1 At the 2-furlong marker, Elusive Kate, ridden by Buick, is galloping close to the far rails, with her head turned slightly to her right, towards the rails. Sky Lantern, ridden by Hughes, is a length behind her, and…
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SIR HENRY CECIL
I never met Henry Cecil. Very, very attractive human beings are rare, and superb trainers are even rarer. To have passed a lifetime not that far away from one who earned both accolades and to have neglected to find my way into the presence is negligence indeed, and I have already started living to regret…
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Mupdate 10 (June Round-Up)
Racing Ascot is already a bit of a blur in my memory – there was too much going on, and I was constantly being distracted. My strongest impressions? I suspect that John Warren is helping the Queen to get more fun (and success) out of her racing than has ever been her lot in the…
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General 2: Cameron & Marriage
Here we have a Prime Minister who wishes to encourage, applaud and recommend domestic arrangements between couples of the same sex. Why not? Such arrangements have been common practice and in good standing for several decades. One might share Cameron’s somewhat tardy enthusiasm for this cause – except for one thing. He calls what he…
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Mupdate 9: May Round-Up
Racing 1. Just before the 2000 Guineas I was interested to hear a C4 voice saying: “There is no parade. The horses go down to the start one by one, passing the stands on their way. This is to avoid getting them stewed up by the preliminaries.” It’s ironic that in jump racing, whenever a…
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SPORT 30: Horse Racing & Animal Welfare – Part 2
I have read with interest the post-Aintree reactions of those most closely concerned with that meeting in general and with the Grand National in particular. I was reminded that the racing authorities maintain good relations and a continuing dialogue with the RSPCA. Both parties have an interest in animal welfare and the exchange of ideas…
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Mupdate 8: April Round-Up
Racing Liverpool Foxhunters and Topham Trophy. In both cases the starts involved two bad practices (close-packed formation and a period of uncomfortable rotation) and both races experienced false starts. Grand National. The two bad practices were omitted and the start was perfect. Scottish Grand National. The bad practices were re-introduced and the start was a…
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Sport 29: THE AINTREE IRONY
What new evidence has Aintree 2013 added to the Great Starting Debate? “Thursday, 3.40 Foxhunters. Large field wandering around at the start, under no form of direction or control. Followed by the Demented Carousel and a False Start. Eriday , 3.40 Topham. Large field wandering around at the start, under no form of direction or…
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MUPDATE 7 (MARCH)
Racing 2.40 Cheltenham. 12th March.”They’re whizzing round” and “ Such-and-such is sweating buckets.” Two of the comments from C4’s eagle-eyed watchers. Describing the scene,in the holding area, off the course, before the start, when two lines of eight, plus a few, were rotating at the “Watranter” pace, an ugly composite of the equine’s first, second and…
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Monthly Update 6: February Round-up
Football In view of rugby union’s ongoing “trial” of Television Monitoring of Foul Play (with the power to intervene instantly), it is interesting to see Sepp Blatter bouncing with excitement over his decision to implement Goal Line Television Supervision in soccer. I am always intrigued by the way Blatter talks a good game on the…
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BBC: Bottom of the Barrel
On the evening of Sunday 17th February the BBC gave us “Problems with Drink,” the finale of its “Blandings” series. This saga first saw the light of day in a book by PG Wodehouse entitled “Galahad at Blandings” – a very readable but by no means top-class example of the maestro’s art, and remarkable mainly…
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BBC v WODEHOUSE: More Foul Play
“BLANDINGS” BBC1 10th February 2013 “Lord Emsworth and the Girl Friend” Let the credits roll. Guy Andrews (writer), Spencer Campbell (producer), Paul Seed (director), Michelle Buck and Damien Trimmer (executive producers), and Christian Smith (BBC executive producer). You’ve done it again. An almost complete cock-up of another of Wodehouse’s finest stories. The BBC…
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BBC SAVAGES WODEHOUSE
On Sunday evening (Feb 3)) I watched something called “Blandings” on BBC 1. This is based on a book of Wodehouse short stories called “Lord Emsworth Acts for the Best.” This particular episode was based on a story called “The Crime Wave at Blandings.” The main features of the story are an airgun, on the…
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Monthly Update 5: January Update
Racing Saturday 26th January saw the return of top class NH racing and another chance for the new look C4 TV to make an impression. This all came together at 1.50 when Clare Balding approached trainer Nickie Henderson and announced that ” racing’s on and we’re all raring to go!” She had failed to appreciate…
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SPORT 28: STARTING! AGAIN? I’m afraid so!
“Look at them now. They’re all bunched up and getting competitive.” A description, not of galloping horses reaching the top of the hill at Cheltenham, but of the “holding area” down at the start of the 2.25 at Warwick on 12th January, 2013, where 18 runners were in the first stages of the starting process.…
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Monthly Update 4: December Round-up
Most of the things I think about, this winter, make me spit with rage. Perhaps it’s something to do with the weather. However, putting that sort of stuff into words on paper does nobody a favour, so I am going to keep my rages to myself. Instead I will offer my public something that can…
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SPORT 27: WELL, IT’S A START
In recent weeks, watching racing on TV, I’ve noticed that down at the start there is a lot more walking going on, where once one saw horses milling about in a mildly chaotic fashion quite a lot of the time. If my eyes have not deceived me, I congratulate whoever is responsible for this change.…
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Monthly Update 3: Postscript to 2
England’s victory over the All Blacks was absolutely stunning. I don’t think they played better when they won the World Cup. The late great Carwyn James himself would have enthused over their performance. Its significance is like an iceberg – four fifths is invisible. Let me try to illuminate. The All Blacks came to Twickenham…
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MONTHLY UPDATE 2: November Round-up
Rugby Union From what little I saw of the autumn internationals, we can look forward to a rubbish winter on a global scale. I have only two lasting impressions. South Africa reminded the world that, with the whole-hearted backing of the Old Testament, they continue to feel justified in inflicting GBH on such opponents as…
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Sport 26; STARTING – 11th NOVEMBER 2012
The start of the Badger Ales Chase at Wincanton on November 10th was interesting. The horses were on the track when the TV cameras first focussed on them, 13 runners walking round in threes or fours: horses and riders relaxed, comfortable, at ease and ready to go to work. When the starter asked them…
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Monthly Updates 1.
At the end of November, we will issue an account of all that has caught our eye during the month, for better or for worse – the good, the bad and the ugly. Without fear or favour. At the end of each subsequent month, unless the world gets frightfully boring, the same process will be…
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SPORT 25: Starting Large NH fields
I question the necessity of taking the runners off the course at the start, and it is certainly true that with large fields (15 is about the tipping point) it is the return to the racing surface that triggers the flaw in the system. However, let us suppose that the present “holding area” continues to…
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24: FRANKEL, PART TWO
My one worry about Frankel’s run at York, on Wednesday, 22nd August 2012, concerned the journey from the racecourse stables on the far side of the back straight to the racecourse proper. Normally, runners are led across, between races, and this can be a period when a high-strung horse can get upset. I thought…
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23: FRANKEL’S PLACE IN HISTORY
In 1946 Fred Darling of Beckhampton, England’s premier trainer (seven Derby winners to his name), had in his care Tudor Minstrel, a two-year-old well enough bred to win him another Derby. In 1946 Tudor Minstrel was unbeaten in four races and ended the season as the highest-rated two-year old in Britain. In 1947 he won…
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Sport 22: JULY LOCAL SURVEY
FOOTBALL The bare facts of the Eurochampionships speak for themselves. England were beaten (not at football, but at penalties) by Italy, who ended up as losing finalists. That means that, at European level, England is competitive. It was also quite a good result in another way. Losing their semifinal saved them from a hammering at…
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Sport 21: Amir Khan makes me weep
I weep for the waste of talent so far. I weep for the tragedy which may well lie ahead. Am I over-reacting? Judge for yourselves….. Here is a young warrior. He has courage, he has skill. More to the point, he is taller and stronger and has a longer reach than almost anybody in his…
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20: GRAND NATIONAL COMMENTARY?
The Grand National, first run in the middle of the 19th century, developed into the ultimate test for horse and rider, over a long distance and across what used to be described as “a stiff country.” That’s what it was there for, and perhaps that is still what it is there for: a test to cater…
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SPORT 19: STARTING POINTS 4
. Haydock Park.12th May 2012 2.00 Hurdle Race 3 miles 18 runners 3.40 Hurdle Race 2 miles 19 runners The runners stayed on the track throughout the preliminaries before both of these races. This was good, because it eliminated the quite legitimate “Am-I-going-to-be-left-behind?” worry which is so often a feature of races with big…
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MUNCH SCREAM NOT RUBBISH
THE SCREAM by EDVARD MUNCH has recently become the highest price artwork ever to be sold at auction. THE SCREAM is a danger signal, a warning that human existence can at any time destroy such peace of mind as the viewer (of the picture, as well as of this note) may have achieved. But it…
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SPORT 18: STARTING POINTS 3
(BIG FIELDS, CHAOS) Aintree, 2012 Thursday. I watched the Foxhunters, a big field, with I think two false starts. Amateur riders, and I am sure management will claim that everything that went wrong was the riders’ fault. Management chooses to ignore the fact that at Cheltenham the best start of the week (with a big…
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SPORT 17: STARTING POINTS 2
The first race on the Wednesday of the Cheltenham Festival (I had been otherwise engaged on the Tuesday) was the National Hunt Chase, with 20 runners ridden by amateur riders. This was likely to be the perfect example of the current starting system at its worst when dealing with a large field. As I have…
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SPORT 16: STARTING POINTS 1
In the past, steeplechasers cantered down to the start, then walked round in a circle behind the tapes while tack adjustments and similar preliminaries were attended to. All this in an atmosphere of calm and quiet that suited the horses, their jockeys, their owners and trainers, and the public. This system proved satisfactory for two…
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SPORT 15: RACING’S LAST (AND BEST) CHANCE? BITTAR
Mr Paul Bittar’s reaction to the whip problem has been a marvel to behold. One “Comment” in the Racing Post said “He’s the best Ozzie to come to England since Scobie Breasley.” Absolutely right. He may even turn out to be in the Bradman class. Let us not forget that the whip business is merely…
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Sport 14: Horse Racing & Animal Welfare
Throughout the Whip Debate so far I have been intrigued by occasional expressions of concern, within the racing community itself, about the public’s “perception” of racing’s Animal Welfare (AW) arrangements, and about the possibility of legal action launched by those who think that racing’s performance is not up to standard in that department. I found this…
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SPORT 12: Dr Tim MORRIS (alias WHIPPERSNAPPER)
No jockeys featured on the BHA’s Whip Rules Committee. Membership was restricted to BHA insiders. The functions of most of them suggest that they were Disciplinarians. (See BHA website). The most interesting member of the party is Dr Tim Morris, BHA Director of Equine Science and Welfare. His details read as follows: “A visiting professor…
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SPORT 11: Latest Bulletin – Sport Dying!
Throughout the world sport is under siege from criminals who wish to corrupt it in order to enrich themselves through the agency of worldwide crooked gambling and other ramifications of a sinful nature. We are not talking peanuts here. The vastness of the numbers involved has become truly impressive since globalisation became a reality. Certain sports have…
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SPORT 10: J’accuse…. Andy Murray
For the first eight games of his Wimbledon semi-final, Murray played Nadal like a smart angler outwitting a less than brilliant fish. He achieved this by guile, subtlety and consummate skill, without ever resorting to brute strength. The rapier rather than the bludgeon. These endeavours were magnificently supported by a first serve which was often unplayable…
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General 1: Democracy
If democracy is adopted by a local community, local decisions will be made by the majority of those who live in that community, and know a bit about what goes on – so that’s all right. But if democracy is extended to cover national decisions, those decisions will be being made by people, the vast majority of whom…
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Sport 9: CARWYN JAMES AND “THAT TRY”
I have always known that Carwyn James was the greatest rugby coach ever (his Lions’ tours were both successful and his Welsh club Llanelli beat a touring All Blacks side). I also knew that not everybody liked him – he was never coach to the Welsh national team because the men at HQ didn’t like…
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SPORT 8: Eye-Gouging, International Rugby Board blindfolded?
In the third Lions’ Test, the wretched Springboks wore armbands in support of one of their forwards, who was banned for a misdemeanour in the previous test, and the International Rugby Board (IRB) charged them with an improper gesture. Big deal! For the last ten years to my certain knowledge, up to and including the…
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BBC Part 1: Could there be Life After Death?
The parentage of the BBC was a marriage between the national despair at the pointless waste of human life for which the First World War was responsible, and the hope for a better future, something to which the brand new technology called radio might well make a significant contribution; at a time when mankind was…
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POLITICS 7: Western Democracy, Systemic Failure, Model Recall?
Promoting “Western Democracy” has become embarrassing since that process produced George Bush and Tony Blair (followed by the Unspeakable Rictus, Gordon Brown) as the best it could offer in the way of leadership. Bush turned out to be a grinning puppet with strings attached to a group of selt-serving megalomaniacs, while Blair has been responsible…
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SPORT 7: Paradise Spurned
The FA is within touching distance of football paradise, but refuses to pop the question, tie the knot and live happily ever after. I wonder why. As things stand at this moment, every television viewer in the land knows everything that happens on the field of play, often beyond dispute, always immediately, and usually with the benefit of…
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POLITICS 6: Democracy – The real cause for concern.
Democracy 6: The real cause for concern. The only cause for real concern.
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POLITICS 4 (MRSA Westminster variety)
A crooked man recruits a band of equally crooked nonentities and tells them that they are going to go into politics, because in politics there are no rules against corrupt practices (instead there are traditions, which have no teeth whatsoever). What’s more, if you get caught doing naughty things or simply being thoroughly incompetent, there…
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POLITICS 5 (Sewer Rats)
For the sake of argument, let us say that the legacy of the Labour government, when its time is up, will be a level of corruption in government circles and throughout the public services far greater than anything Britain has experienced in the last two centuries. This came about because Tony (bless him) couldn’t lie straight…
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SPORT 6: In her Hour of Need
All at Donec are of Celtic origin, and usually indulge in a certain amount of hilarity when England suffers, but the dismal situation of her football team demands a multinational approach, so we are all pitching in. Who is responsible for England’s dismal record? Chief among the suspects is the FA, an odd group who seem to…
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Sport 5
From our Sports correspondent. The time has come to tackle the weird and wonderful world of English Cricket – before it’s too late and the national side embarks on the next stage in its downward spiral. What right have I got to pontificate on a subject as arcane as the realm of leather on willow?…
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POLITICS 3
POLITICS 3 His legacy. I suppose it must relate to his career. He started by persuading the Labour Party to shelve temporarily their more extreme socialist principles. That way, I imagine he explained, we will get into power. Once that has been achieved, we can be as socialist as we like. Power was achieved, but that…
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sport 4
From our sporting correspondent: In Sport 3, I referred to the disappointing form of the England football team. Since then we have had the game against Israel, which caused tumultuous wailing and gnashing of teeth like you wouldn’t believe. Also the Andorra game, which did little to change the public’s perception of how things are.…
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Sport 3
I know nothing about football, but I watch the best games fairly regularly ( International matches, European club competitions, also the top teams in the Premiership). One thing particularly intrigues me: the England team is made up of players who perform magnificently, week in and week out, in the Premiership. When they play in international…
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Politics 2
Let’s suppose that only the air we breathe is more pervasive than government. If air is poisonous, it causes long-term sickness to all the living things that breathe it. It is arguable therefore that if government is corrupt, it exposes all those who live under its influence to corruption, which they will either resist or…
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CULTURE 1: Poetic
There is a poem which goes as follows: Le tems a laissie son manteau De vent, de froidure et de pluie Et s’est vestu de broderye De soleil riant, cler et beau Il n’y a beste ne oiseau Que en son jargon ne chante ou crye: Le tems a laissie son manteau. Riviere, fontaine et…
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Introduction to Politics
The thing to bear in mind is the pervasiveness of government. It touches every single citizen all the time and in many ways. Just think health, education, employment, tax, law and order, war and peace – just a few of the aspects of every man’s life in which government features – and you will get…